The email came out three minutes after the promised 4:00 pm time. One mom had already texted me their daughter’s class selection and I hadn’t received Zoe’s yet. Not anxious at all as I waited and refreshed my inbox on the computer. I didn’t want to manipulate the process.  I kept my wishes between me and God and trusted He’s got Zoe’s best interest in mind.  

It’s deja vu when it comes to waiting on what teacher my kids are going to get.  Even though it seems like a lifetime ago that Jacob and Blaire were in this same situation, I recall relying on God’s decisions.  We decided two years ago to take Zoe out of a private Christian school to be an example and light in a new neighborhood and public school.  Back when I had a four year old and one year old and just moved to the USA, I wasn’t so sure about public school for my kids.  Jacob was reading at the time and so eager to learn.  I didn’t want to send him to school and get caught up in the ‘wasted’ time spent on getting 25 kids to sit and listen.  Now of course, I’ve changed my view of what God wanted for our children.  We did homeschool, and did the Christian school thing but after a few years I’m so glad we asked God where He wanted them and that was public school.  We didn’t intend to shelter our kids.  In the informative years, I do believe every child is different, but we developed the love of learning, controlled social media influence and grew as a family while I homeschooled for 5 years.   An option arose to transition them to a small Christian school one year at a time and they flourished.  Once we heard the call to public school we were scared.  We cried and trusted and knew our kids were up to the task of standing out and being confident in what they believed.  It wasn’t always easy and more tears were shed but they grew and it shaped and molded them to who they are today.  Thank God.  

Once we thought about adopting another child, I thought that meant homeschooling again and possibly go through the exact process.  It worked once, why not again?  Zoe is a different child.  She was inquisitive and learned English so quickly.  She became confident and assured of who she was so in no time at all ,  preschool made sense.  She has always loved being around other kids and thrives off it.  She’s not easily influenced but she learns from others.  I also needed a break, so that was what we did.  

I’ve been praying all summer for the right class for Zoe to be in. But once I found out, I began my negative thinking process as I always do. Facebook has a school page and once I logged on I began to scan all the kids NOT in Zoe’s class. I wondered why and in doing so I was really questioning God. I do believe God has Zoe’s best interest at heart. She is friendly and liked by most kids and has created special bonds with girls from her last two classes in her new school. Her appointed teacher wasn’t her first pick although a great selection. She was positive and said, ‘I’m sure I will like him’. How can I mess with that attitude? I kept my thoughts and comments to myself but still beat myself up over how I truly felt.  

Praying for God’s guidance doesn’t mean I’m only happy if the outcome is how I planned it. I should recall that our move to Michigan wasn’t what I actually planned for but God has created so many amazing opportunities for our family here. Yeah God. 

Adopting Zoe wasn’t in my plan but once we surrendered I can’t even imagine what our lives would be like without her. Thank you Lord. With each parenting decision we have made for our kids like school changes and neighborhood moves and church moves, I don’t want my life to play out the way I imagined it. My mind is limited and shallow and God is great and powerful and imaginative, so therefore, I need to be content in all circumstances. (Philippians 4:11) In the same chapter and verse 6 and 7 it says, (My paraphrase) don’t be anxious about anything but bring all your ‘asks’ to God and the peace of God will come over you.  I can have peace that I laid this school issue at the feet of Jesus no matter what the outcome is.

Yesterday, I was reminded by a friend that the testimony of our lives is the example of our lives as we go through a series of tests.  We are tested every day.  Choices are before us.  Do we choose what’s quick and easy or do we go for the struggle and the ‘leaning on Jesus’ choices?  In my experience, the latter has the best outcomes.  

Dannah Gresh says Unless we slow down in praise and humility, we forget the One who is really producing fruit and calling the shots.  

So, as I prepare my daughter for fourth grade in public school I want to be full up on prayer, have open conversations with her and as they allow, I want to be active in my school and daughter’s class.  I love getting to know her friends and be apart of all the fun activities as the year goes on.  Whatever stage your kids are in, never give up on bringing your asks to God.  So when you do, don’t be gripped by fear but filled with freedom that He’s got them.

I’m joining in my second year of a Moms In Prayer group that I’m so happy to say our school has.  What a blessing to meet other prayerful moms in our district and neighborhood.  Look one up for your school if you feel called to be apart of one.  www.momsinprayer.org