A Good Cry

So have you had one yet? You know, a good cry. That moment when you let go of the tension you have held on to for far too long. That feeling of doing everything for everyone and you are growing weary. Or maybe it’s the overload on your brain. Sad or even grim information filtrating your home via your TV, phone, Alexa scroll, every social media site. Heck, even while my daughter is on an educational site, taking the place of her conventional classroom, she is reading reminder pop ups to wash her hands often. Not knowing how to feel when we wake up is another crazy feeling. So cry it out! 

I mean how many times can I hear the word ‘unprecedented’. Jokes fly around about making it a drinking game. Take a shot every time you hear that word. I’m not a drinking game kind of gal but come on, aren’t most of us on the verge to doing just that!  Since this COVID-19 has hit our country we have experienced the other word we have seen all too often; Canceled (I’ve chosen to go with the American spelling of this word…look it up) In my world it came at one of our busiest weekends. A beloved International Festival at my daughter’s elementary school. Then it was her last basketball game and party. I had a cancer fundraiser canceled and dinner with friends. Then it was church and a baptism and a friend’s mother’s memorial. I mean I usually have busy weekends but that was all rolled into one. One weekend! Right around the corner for most Americans is our week of Spring Break. Oh, it’s canceled.  We will just postpone it all. Another yucky word we have all had thrown into our vocabulary involuntarily. And I can go on and on. Honestly as I was saddened by ‘my loss’ I was trying to empathize with a friend losing her father to health complications and the biggest complication was just to get to visit him. Many people have loved ones in a senior home and cannot visit them. My parents are elderly but I’m so thankful we literally just experienced a relaxing week in Florida with them.   I’m praying that holiday didn’t compromise their health but having the borders literally closed, so just going over to say hello in Canada for a day is not even an option now.

So we get back to how we can just make it through this day. Make this brand new Monday not just bearable but cherish-able. Well, if you recall,  I’m the mom who cheers when summer vacation is over! I dance my way to school as I kiss Zoe goodbye and yell out ‘freedom’. Well, I must begin my day, as I usually like to, and that is being in God’s word. The Bible reunites me with the God I have relied on throughout my whole life. Dating, marriage, motherhood, adoption, friendship. I can’t enter into any of these things without guidance, hope and love expressed through the life of Jesus. So I call that focus. 

Doing good for others is the next thing that drags me out of sadness. My word for 2020 is Serve. In a time of isolation (another word for that proverbial drinking game) we need to look out for others. We all grabbed enough toilet paper for our household but you might have ‘a square to share’ (thanks Seinfeld for that hilarious visual) Who will it be for? What neighbor needs a sidewalk visit. A love drop of cookies or a friendly note saying ‘I’m here and I care’. I’m also trying to call someone a day and I’m a big letter writer so we might as well give our amazing mail carriers something worthwhile to deliver. Something I didn’t know was missing in my day was quiet time with Zoe. Again, if you know me, you know that Zoe jumps out of bed talking and it’s always too soon for me. I have asked God to work on me. Usually we have one hour to get ready for school. This is plenty of time but it hasn’t been priority to begin with the Bible and prayer. Hopefully this unexpected halt to our usual routine will establish this habit I have neglected with her. 

So how will this Monday look for you? Probably very different than your daily planner would tell you. We are working out from home, some are homeschooling, some have adult children back under one roof. The crazy ones are getting a dog. Sorry. I had to throw that in. Enjoy.

I’m done crying and now smiling.

Zoe is trying to respect my time finishing this blog but calls out from the laundry room, ‘Mom, how do I turn on the dryer?’ Confused I call back ‘Why’?  Zoe: Because I want to dry my clothes’. I call out the instructions and watch my very satisfied ten year old walk back out of our laundry room and get dressed for her day. Kids are resilient and since we don’t have our TV on blasting warnings and gloom all day my daughter can adjust to her new look on life. It’s temporary right? Quarantining is strange when we don’t feel sick. I understand that we need to know the facts but I want to be in charge of when I receive it. So let’s keep our phone calls and texts light and uplifting. And when we begin to focus on ourselves and our ‘losses’ we know that most likely someone else is going through something bigger and more difficult.

Isaiah 41:13 – For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.  

1 Peter 5:6-7 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.  Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 

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